Saturday, July 16, 2011


So I have allowed myself to succumb to the tears. But only for tonight because tomorrow is a new day. I feel easily frustrated and lack the great amount of patience needed to raise two very busy boys. Therefore, I feel like a terrible mother. My house is a mess, laundry is piling up around me and the sink is full of dishes. So I will let the tears fall.

And then, I will continue my list of things I am grateful for. I know there are a lot. I don't want to sit and wallow in self pity but the hormones are currently taking over my good sense and I am letting them. I felt that the only way to focus on what is really important is to look at all the things I am grateful for.

63. A little 22 month old who smiles through the chemo and says "bye bye Jo Jo" as I leave

64. Waking up to 64 degrees in my house in the middle of July

65. Friends and family who give with their whole hearts and expect nothing in return

66. Fresh cut grass

67. Purple plums right from the tree

68. Family bike rides

69. The first little flutters of an unborn baby

70. Playing dress up

71. Kiddie pools

I feel better. Tomorrow is a new day.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Update on Madyn

Look at that face...she is the cutest!

Madyn has finished her first phase of chemo. Yay! However, she came down with a fever on July 2nd and ended up spending the whole weekend and 4th of July in the hospital fighting off the infection. Because chemo lowers the immune system it is always a scary time when an infection invades the body. But, she is a little fighter and they were able to go home Tuesday the 5th.

They were supposed to start the second round of chemo yesterday July 8th but her ANC count (risk of infection) was too low they had to postpone for 7 days. It does give her little body a rest but then just prolongs the treatment. Also, test results came back that she has 2 of the 3 cancer fighting chromosomes but the lack of 1 and cell count on day 8 put her in the high risk treatment category with more aggressive therapy. She still has a great prognosis and high chances of no cancer ever coming back. The blessings amidst the tragedy is what keeps the family going.

I feel God's presence all over this situation in the amount of people who have stepped forward to help. Friends, family and even people who do not personally know the Fraziers have stepped forward to donate money, items for an auction, and even to host fundraisers. This is so amazing to me it leaves me speechless.

I do want to share some of the fundraising opportunities if you would like to get involved with:

- If you would like to just donate money you can click on the "donate" button on the top right of this blog, or send me a message and I can reply with my address.

- Helen Young is hosting an online auction. If you would like to donate an item or bid on any of the items please email her at

- I am also hosting a few poker tournaments in the next few months so if you are interested please contact me.

- Security First Bank is hosting a bowling tournament August 6th from 2:00 to 4:00 at Blackstone Bowl.

For information on all of the fundraising events going on now and when new ones become available please visit the facebook page Make a Difference (MAD) for Madyn.

Almost 4 months already!

I feel like I need different blogs for different aspects of my life. I sit down to type and I think about everything that has happened since the last post and I feel overwhelmed by everything I need to touch on. The whole point of doing this blog is to keep record of things going on and clearly, I'm not very good at it.

The pregnancy has been going very smoothly now that I don't have weekly doctor appointments and blood work. I think besides the birth of this baby, the day I was released from the fertility doctor was the most exciting day of this pregnancy. Talking with other surrogates, it is not usual to have weekly monitoring or meds for as long as I did (which was up until week 13). This is part of the reason I call Dr. H a mad scientist. She is good at what she does and wants to make sure all of the hard work pays off. And even weeks later, as I sit down, I am reminded of the three months of shots I endured and am grateful for the mad scientist because there is a healthy baby growing inside my belly.

I had my last routine ultrasound at week 12 with my favorite ultrasound tech Nancy. It was bittersweet because she has been so helpful and she even let us record the last appointment. If I can eventually get that edited a little I will post that as well. The baby was moving all over and it was so fun to get that on video to share with T and F. Well, when I share it with them. Sorry guys!

Nancy (my awesome ultrasound tech) and I - at our last appointment

12 weeks

I then went in at 13 weeks 3 days to have a genetic ultrasound test done so I was able to see the little one again then. Everything looked good but we are still waiting on results. The joys of medical tests...hurry up and wait. Sounds like my life.

13 weeks 3 days

Well, since I don't have a lot of updates I will share some pictures. And to get it out of the way so I don't have to keep saying "the baby." It's a girl!!! Now, just waiting on a name. Hint, hint F and T!

I was given permission by F to share pictures of her. So I would like to introduce you to the mommy! This was the morning of our transfer and I am holding a picture of the two little embryos that were transferred.

Mad scientist, host uterus, and the mommy.

12 weeks pregnant

13 weeks - please ignore the hair and lack of make-up

14 weeks 3 days

15 weeks - the camera adds 10 pounds (I'm sure of it)

F was also able to make a quick trip up to Visalia with a friend of hers. So I drove down there to meet them for lunch. It was so quick but so nice to get to see her and meet one of her friends.

Whew - That's all I have to say about that!