Monday, March 21, 2011

Rain, Hail, Snow....Oh Yeah and Wind

Woke up at 4 am Sunday morning to get myself ready for the drive ahead. Packed up a few things, went and picked up my amazing sister-in-law Kara who has now become my official passenger for LA trips and we were on our way. I asked her if she wouldn't mind praying as we started off on this trip and it turned out we did need God and all the angels he could spare to be with us on our way down south. Wow, I had never driven in weather that bad. I'm sure it could have been worse but this wasn't very safe. But I couldn't imagine having to put off this journey for one more month because we couldn't get down to LA over the weather. So we put on some old school jams (which I do have to say, my taste in music from high school was quite hip.) I especially liked the cds with country music, hints of soft rock and the occasional rap song. My taste in music changed with the type of boyfriend I was dating or the emotions that were running wild back then. Aw the good old days...
As we were driving along we got to experience the rain, and then harder rain, the sideways rain, the hail and then at the highest part of the grapevine, snow. I didn't know if my "baby" Honda accord was going to make it, but she did great. We made it down with 30 minutes to spare before my appointment time of 10:15. When I got there F was waiting for me with an amazing surprise. A fellow surrogate friend of mine had driven to my appointment to officially meet in person. I was so touched that she would take the time to come and see me.
So I went into the exam room, had my ultrasound and blood work done and they gave me to okay to leave. This took all of 10 minutes. We said our goodbyes and Kara and I were on the road again. It had not started raining in LA yet but as soon as we hit downtown LA it was on. It was pouring and windy. I just focused on the white lines on the road and made sure I was between them, all the while praying that we would make it home. I had my family coming over that night for a birthday barbecue for me and I was not about to miss it. We did make it home, but I believe it was only by the grace of God. That is not something I would like to do again anytime soon and it is looking like I probably won't have to.
The doctor called and told me to start the medication i needed to get my body ready for the transfer. We have been waiting 3 months for those words and they sounded so sweet. If my body does what it is supposed to on the medication we should be transferring in the beginning of April. So many things to be grateful for.

Here is my box of goodies.

36. A reliable car

37. Snow topped mountains

38. New friends

39. A driving buddy - Kara, I couldn't do it without you.

40. Barbecue with family

41. Family who will stop by and bring you dinner just because - Thank you Jill!

42. Ice cream cake

43. The first bloom of the season

44. A relaxing mini-vacation with my main squeeze

Monday, March 14, 2011

The boys' gratitude list

I need to blog but I can't seem to reign in my thoughts. Travis and I just got back from Monterey and I want to share about that trip but it will have to be at another time. I recently read a blog about a mother who gave her sons a journal and had them start their grateful list. I thought that was a wonderful idea so the boys started their list today and I wanted to share it. With the rate they are going, they will reach 1000 before I do. Most of these were thought of by Sawyer but Hudson threw in a couple too.

1. Godzilla
2. Ya Ya (Mollie)
3. Aunt Megs (this was Hudson)
4. Soccer pillow
5. Chocolate Cheerios
6. Screw driver
7. Lighter (also Hudson)
8. New easel
9. Books
10. Scissors
11. Stuffed Cat in the Hat and dinosaur
12. Gummy medicine
13. Prunes
14. Mommy
15. Go Dino
16. Bubbles
17. Jesus

I did not help them with this list. I do however like that I am below Godzilla but above Go Dino. Two of their favorite shows. I do also love that they look around the room to find things they are thankful for. "I love lamp." And it melts my heart that Jesus is on their list. It is lower on the list than Jesus himself would appreciate but we are all a work in progress.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

My Grandparent's house

I didn't think it would be so hard knowing my grandparent's house would be sold. I am really good at pushing things away and not thinking about them and therefore not feeling anything about them. But as I looked at the listing of my grandparent's and the pictures that were posted I was overwhelmed with sadness. Sadness that I will never again go back there and visit them. Sadness that I will never again make new memories in that house. Sadness that my children will never visit their great grandparents and make their own memories.

Travis and I had talked about taking a trip back to Massachusetts this spring to visit my grandfather and letting our kids experience what I had when I was a child. It seemed like a whole different world back there. It was so quiet and peaceful back there. There was a freshness in the air that smelled so sweet. No one rushed around to do anything, except to get to church on time. There is a playground 3 houses down from my grandparent's house where I spent the summer swinging on the swings and dreaming of the future. My brothers and I would play basketball and then run off into the forest behind the playground while our imaginations ran wild. I met a boy and had a summer fling that quickly fizzled when I left paradise. We watched our younger cousins grow up each year we visited and saw ourselves growing too as the thought of a wiffle ball game seemed too tiring and we gladly chose instead a game of cribbage or dominoes with our grandfather.

I look at the pictures and still see my grandparents sitting in their recliners watching Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune (shows they never missed), my grandfather falling asleep in his chair and my grandmother knitting. The back screen stands strong now after years of it never sliding right since I ran right through it one year with excitement to hug my grandparents. The back loft has a railing now which never did as we grew up. We would love to go up there and look through "treasures" to see what we could find to play with.

The yellow room was always the one I stayed in. Since I was the only girl my brothers had to sleep in the stifling hot attic as I got my own room. The computer used to be in the same room as me and so I could always stay up late chatting with friends back home. I was always homesick for them but knew I wouldn't be able to come back to Massachusetts for a visit for awhile and needed to enjoy my time.

The other room with the hardwood floors was always for my mother and father when he came. And in the final upstairs room lived a man who drank his life away. He lived in such a depression that no one could reach him until last year when his body could not handle the strain of all the years of smoking and drinking. He was my uncle and I was his princess. The alcohol changed him and he wasn't very nice when he drank, but I loved him... I love him.

So now, with all of the rooms empty, the house needs a new family to make new memories. It is hard to say goodbye but life goes on even when family members are gone and houses get sold. So I will hang my grandparent's cockoo clock in my house and remember the good times and I will go on making memories with my family so when I am gone they will have good memories to carry them on.