Happy Valentine's Day!

Valentine's day has always been a very disappointing holiday for me. When I was in high school and I didn't have a boyfriend I was sad that all the other girls carried around flowers or balloons and I wished I had that. Then when I had a boyfriend he didn't go to the same school as me and I always expected the impossible. I always had really high expectations of this holiday. I imagined it would be as special as in the movies. The guy would show up with an amazing bouquet of flowers with a poem that only professional writers could write and would sweep me off my feet. Needless to say, that never happened.

Then I got married. Never again would I have to spend a Valentine's day alone. My husband would definitely make a big deal of Valentine's day. I mean it is the day of love and since he loved me so much he would be able to come up with the most creative ways to show me he loved me. Each Valentine's day would come and go and I would be disappointed because my expectations were beyond reachable. God did not wire Travis to read my mind and have these amazingly creative ideas of how to romance me and show me he loved me in the way I wanted him to with such grand gestures.

So this year I did not have any expectations. We decided to go to dinner tomorrow night so we did not have to fight other people for a table and just spend time together. The boys and I made cards and cupcakes for him. He came home early and made dinner for us while we enjoyed watching Newsies. I felt the love he had for me in the way he served our family. We went to the store and bought flowers for me to plant tomorrow. Those are my favorite kind of flowers to get. The kind that will last longer than a week. Thank you my dearest valentine for making me feel so loved today and always.



29. Cupcakes decorated and frosted by 2 cute little boys.



30. Chicken fettuccine Alfredo.



31. Newsies - one of my all time favorites.

32. Strawberries - I can't believe how good they taste already.



33. Flowers.



34. Boys chasing the dog around the house.



35. Family movie night - cuddling under blankets in the middle of the front room.

Almost there and a birthday

I received a call last night from the psychologist saying she got the test results for my MMPI (longest exam of my life). In her famous last words, I am "the right kind of crazy for this journey". Those are her favorite words "the right kind of crazy". I personally think she is a little crazy, but that doesn't matter because I am cleared! She told me that it is hard when "moral" people take this kind of test because it shows them as being rigid in there thinking. So I guess I'm rigid because I'm not afraid of the dark, I don't smash things when I'm angry, I love my parents and I generally think the best of people. If that is the case then thank you. I will gladly be called "rigid". She made it sound like a bad thing. I know if I were looking for someone to carry my baby I would want someone with very high morals which is exactly what F told her. All we care about is one more hoop checked off and that much closer to starting the exciting stuff... the meds and getting pregnant.



Today we were able to celebrate my younger brother's birthday. My brother Jim, whom I lovingly call Jimbo turned 27 yesterday. I love celebrations with my family. We all get together and it is loud and busy and so much fun. My boys get so excited that they get a little crazy then we add cake and it is pure madness. I wouldn't change it for the world. My brother Jim is one of the greatest guys I know. When we were growing up we were always on the same team. We both have red hair and my other two brothers have brown hair so it was the redheads against the brownies. We hardly ever won whatever game we were playing but we were the team with the worst tempers. Both of us with red hair, tempers just came with the territory. We had so much fun together. I would love when people would ask us if we were twins. I would always say yes (even though he is 2 years younger than me). Now, him standing almost a foot taller than me, we could no longer pass for twins.


He is a man of incredible character. I am amazed at the man is he and am blessed to call him my brother and the godfather to my oldest son. He is a godly man made in the image of Christ and he lives up to that. He is sweet, loving, strong and has an amazing sense of humor. He can always make me laugh and when I think back on fond memories of us growing up, most of them I am laughing. He is also a great writer and if he were writing this it would be much more eloquent but I guess I have to start writing my own things now (he has written every speech for every wedding for our family and friends). I just wanted to take a moment to talk about him and celebrate him in my own small way. Happy birthday Jimbo, I love you.

Grateful On Thursday

This week has been a trying week. I think about my week and what comes to mind are these hearts my children have made in Bible study classes. On one side is white with cotton glued on and the other side has this black rough sand paper. They talk about what kind of heart we should have. Well this week, I've had a black rough poky heart. I have been feeling so frustrated and inconvenienced as if this world revolves around me. Poor me that I have to go to the lab twice, poor me that tests results are taking longer than necessary, poor me...

So, as I was wallowing in my own self pity I realized that I needed to open my eyes and see the blessings that are screaming at me. Hello!!! Look around or you're going to miss it. I now have 3-1/2 days of this week I will never get back but now I must choose how I will spend the rest of today, tomorrow and the days to come. I missed doing my list on Monday of things I am grateful for and so I will do them today.

21. God's grace for when I am done wallowing, he welcomes me home.

22. A successful fundraiser that totally surpassed my expectations.

23. No wait time for my second trip to the lab.

24. Pee in a cup. When Travis went to the lab to do his lab work he fainted. We realized one test was missing and were glad they just needed pee the second time.

25. Acorns with "hats" and the new knowledge that if you drop a rock on them the hats will pop off.


26. Solar energy. Can't wait for a lower energy bill.

27. Squirt bottles that keep my kids busy for hours.

28. Nap time.